Today I feel....

AWFUL!

Why did I push you away?
Lee...I'm sorry.

I think I really hurt you yesterday, I don't know why. You are the only thing that I am living for at the moment.
Your my soulmate dammit.
I remember the first day we met at college and we locked eyes and just clicked, it was so weird. Everyone else in our class thought we were already together. It's amazing to think that was amost four years ago, four years!
We've been through it all baby, we've been through it all together, just you and me.
I was thinking about the times at the back of the theatre when we had audition class and neither of us had rehearsed so we just sat and looked blankly hoping Sandra wouldn't pick us.....and she always did!
You would get up and mince through it hoping for the best and me....I would just fuck it up!
That's me
a fuck up.
Then there was "A Midsummer Night's Dream"
Titania and Oberon....me and you.
Neither rehearsed, too much time spent at the beach!
But we carried it off and got As!
The pictures, the Pizza Hut nights, the nights at Harlem!
I miss it.
I miss the good times.
I'm struck with this illness, I can't help it. I know I'm not the same.
I feel for you, you never know what kind of mood Im going to be in and you always get it....whether it be a high or a low.
I didn't ask to love you, I just do.
Ah fuck I can't explain.
I remember we had a dream to be together always, wherever I am, but the past 6 months have proved this can't happen.
You don't understand, you try....I know you try!
But making me eat.
Hiding my blades.
Stopping me cutting.
Feeding me pills.
DOESN'T HELP.
I NEED SUPPORT.
PLEASE.....before it's too late.
I'm not asking you to be a doctor, I'm merely asking you to love me!